Let Her Know Who's Boss

After the California State Supreme Court decision last week that legalized gay marriage, state officials are in a hurry to update marriage license forms.

The current one-page form uses ‘‘bride’’ and ‘‘groom’’ four times each, and also requires the signatures of an ‘‘unmarried man’’ and an ‘‘unmarried woman,’’ wording that is obviously out of step with the California Supreme Court ruling opening the way for gay marriages.

In Massachusetts, the only other state to legalize gay marriage, ‘‘bride’’ and ‘‘groom’’ were dropped from its marriage certificate in favor of ‘‘Party A’’ and ‘‘Party B.’’ Those individuals then check a box to indicate male or female. In Vermont, which issues certificates of civil union for gays, couples also are identified as ‘‘Party A’’ and ‘‘Party B.’’

Don't wait guys! Let your hetero wife know who's boss!

I stormed right in and told her "I'M PARTNER A! You're PARTNER B! Get used to it!"

(This official declaration will eventually come in useful, for, as we all know, sooner or later, "B" will be for "Bitch".)

And I'm going to get a lot of mileage out of that one.